


Safely Locked Away

by flubber2kool



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-30
Updated: 2013-10-30
Packaged: 2017-12-31 00:20:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1025107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flubber2kool/pseuds/flubber2kool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock Holmes mind palace has an annex. This is where he puts the things he isn't quite sure he wants to remember but can't quite bring himself to forget. Some of the memories are connected with the contents of the safe that's behind John's chair.<br/>This is the story of what's in the safe behind John's chair and what it means to Sherlock</p>
<p>(This is being written for midonz's BBC Sherlock Writing Contest.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safely Locked Away

**Author's Note:**

> This story is being written for midonz's BBC Sherlock Writing Contest. The prompt that I used was No 6 - What's in the safe behind John's chair?

Sherlock's mind palace has an annex. No one knows this but him. This is where he puts the things he isn't quite sure he wants to remember but can't quite bring himself to forget. Some of the memories are connected with the contents of the safe that's behind John's chair. On some nights when John assumes he is up all night working on his experiments, Sherlock looks through the contents of the safe, opening his mind annex as he does so. 

On one such night Sherlock made a cup of tea. Taking it in to the sitting room, he opened the safe. Looking in he started by taking out the mundane stuff. The first thing he removed was the gun that he'd used to shoot the wall. He's put it in there because John had told him that Mrs Hudson didn't like it lying round the flat. Sherlock believed that it was really John that didn't want it lying around. Given John's circumstances, Sherlock thought better of pursuing the matter. The next items he pulled out were three unopened boxes of nicotine patches held together with a rubber band. He kept them in there so that when all his other boxes were empty he would always have enough patches to cope with a three patch problem. 

Putting those aside Sherlock reached in and pulled out the remaining items from the safe. Grabbing them and his mug he went through to the kitchen. Having already cleared off the kitchen table Sherlock put down the items and looked at them. Finishing his tea, Sherlock placed his mug on the sink and sat down. If he was going to do this he knew that the moment had come. If he hesitated, the items would be returned to the safe and the night would be lost. Sherlock wasn't going to let that happen. 

The first item that Sherlock reached for was a packet that held three photographs. The first photograph was of him and Mycroft running round a garden playing aeroplanes. They were both laughing. The second photograph was of him and Mycroft standing together. Sherlock was grinning and Mycroft was standing behind him with his arms round him in a hug. In the final photograph he was sitting on Mycroft's knee reading a book. Mycroft was looking down at Sherlock and looked like he was listening intently. As Sherlock looked at the photographs he remembered how happy he and Mycroft had been when they were young. It took a lot for him to admit to himself that his brother still cared for him. If he was honest, he'd always known that his brother had cared about him, even if he did have the strangest way of showing it. Of course there was no way he was going to tell him that. With a smile of remembrance he put the photographs back in the packet placing it back on the table.

Licking his lips and swallowing hard, Sherlock moved on to the next packet. This was a clear evidence bag that Sherlock was sure he'd taken from New Scotland Yard, although he couldn't recall the exact details of when, where and how he'd come by it. In the bag was a picture of DI Gregory Lestrade, along with an unused syringe. He wasn't sure where he'd got that photograph either. It looked like one that Mycroft might have had lifted from CCTV footage, but he couldn't be certain The reason it was there, along with the syringe, was to remind Sherlock about the demon he'd slayed with Lestrade's help. The demon was drugs. Holding the bag in his hand he smiled what he was fully aware, had anyone been there to see it, would've been seen as a smug grin. As there was no one there it didn't really matter, not that Sherlock would've cared even if there had been. Slowly he put this packet down on the table and looked at the large envelope. 

As Sherlock sat there, he stared at the envelope. It was the thing in the safe that cause him the most problems. It had three letters written on it and they were J.H.W. Sherlock knew what these letters represented. They represented confusion, excitement and fear. There was also a deeper feeling, a feeling that Sherlock has once derided as being completely unnecessary and a complete waste of time and intelligence. Until he'd met John Hamish Watson he'd believed, like his brother, that caring wasn't an advantage. But now he wasn't so sure. Since John had come in to his life he had found that had begun to care about what John thought of him. He'd found himself trying to modify his behaviour to try to make John happy even if he couldn't quite get it right. When he made John angry and John stormed out of the flat Sherlock felt strange emotions, emotions he didn't understand. It was like there was something far deeper going on and John had managed to get in to his heart and soul.

Sherlock felt his pulse quicken as he picked up the envelope. Opening it, he slipped the folder it contained out of it and laid it on the table. He knew that inside it was information on John Hamish Watson, former Captain of the Royal Army Medical Corps. It had mysteriously appeared in 221B a week after John had moved in. Sherlock remembered the note attached to it. It read, 'He is a good man. Try not to drive him away.' 

The folder contained information on John, his life, education and why he joined the R.A.M.C, There was also a detailed account of his tours of duty up to and including receiving the injury that returned him from Afghanistan and invalided him out of the service At the end of the folder there were some A4 sheets with Sherlock's handwriting on. It was these that Sherlock looked at most intently. They were notes of his thoughts and feelings regarding his flatmate. As Sherlock sat there something struck him. On the occasions John told him that he was going to go to the pub to have a drink with Gregory, Sherlock felt something deep in his chest. It wasn't that Sherlock wanted to go to the pub with John. Dear god no. In fact he would rather go to Holmes Manor to have dinner with his mother and Mycroft than do that. No it was more that he didn't want John to go. Sherlock wanted John to stay in the flat so that he could be there for him instead. In a moment of clarity Sherlock realised it was the mere presence of John that he craved. It would be enough to have him in the flat, even if he couldn't see him. Why would he feel like that? Could this be jealousy? That would be something for further study, but not on this night. After adding some more notes Sherlock tucked the sheets of paper in to the back of the folder and put the folder back in to the envelope. 

Getting up Sherlock looked at the items that lay on the table before him one last time, especially the A4 envelope. Gathering them up, he took them back to the safe. As he put them away, Sherlock thought that maybe one day he might be able to tell Mycroft that, as annoying as he could be on so many levels, he was glad he was in his life and that he still cared for him.

Maybe one day he would be able to say thank you to Detective Inspector Gregory Lestrade for giving him a reason to get off the drugs, to stay clean and that he felt that he owed the man his continued existence in this world. 

Then, as he put the A4 envelope in the safe, he began to think about John Hamish Watson and all the feelings and emotions that the man had brought to him. The man perplexed, infuriated and excited him all at once and Sherlock had no idea what to do about it. Maybe one day he might be able to understand it all and when he did he might be able to tell John how he felt. Until then he would keep it to himself. Sherlock closed the safe with a click and made sure it was locked. 

Then he made his way over to the sofa, threw himself on to it and sighed. As he did so he mentally closed the door to his mind annex. Until the next time, everything was safely locked away and he was ready to face another day.


End file.
